When Males are Passive and Females are Aggressive

We know that males who are aggressive and females who are passive are more accepted in our culture. I couldn't help but wonder when it was acceptable for males to be passive and females to be aggressive. In some cases, I found that it is less taboo for a male to be passive when there is a birth or a death. More specifically, when a male's child is born, it is, although not expected, but O.K for them to feel so much joy that they tear up or feel immense happiness. It's the same with a death. When a male loses someone close to them or someone they knew, it is O.K to feel saddness. On the contrary to that, males are not respected as much if they cry because they are supposed to be strong and "manly." Also, in relationships with other males, especially close friends and in adolescence, competition between male peers is fine, but when there is a disagreement, males would rather laugh it off or move on from it. In cases of violence, such as fighting, this is acceptable to do. Males who are passive in romantic relationships are viewed as "charming" and a "helpless romantic." This can be tied with being passive because by acting this way toward their girlfriend or wife, they are thinking about other people and making generally calm, in sense, gestures. It is the same with their mother's. Males who are respectful and kind to their mother's are viewed as "loving" and "kind."



When a female is aggressive, she has to  be selective of when she displays those characteristics. In the media, women who are sexually aggressive are the more desirable women. In the movie "American Beauty," Kevin Spacey plays the father of Thora Birch who has a close friend played by Annette Bening. Anneette Bening, playing a high school aged girl is sexually attracted to Kevin Spacey's character. Although he is aware of the age difference, the fact that she is his daughter's friend and that he is married, he eventually begins to view Annette Bening as sexually attractive. This example is evident because she uses her sexuality to lure him in.



Females are also commended for their aggression in our culture when they are competing against other females. Whether it is in sports, for a better grade, with attention or to look more aesthetically pleasing to the opposite sex, females who are aggressive against other females is more acceptable than if they were competing with males. Much of this behavior in females is adopted from what they see on television or in movies. "Mirroring" these action, like mentioned in "The Role or positive and negative affect in the 'mirroring' of other person's actions," has it's benefits when the actions are positive, but are detrimental if they are negative. When this is all that is portrayed in the media, females are going to believe that these are the things they should be doing, as is the same for any message in the media (Cognitive and Emotion, 0269-9931, Psychology Press, United Kingdom).

Females are also supposed to be aggressive when it comes to their children. Not only are they supposed to be nurturng and loving all the time, they are also supposed to be the stern ones, as well as always being there for them to support, guide and repremand them.