As children, boys are taught to be aggressive. They are encouraged to participate in contact sports, making competition a priority in their lives. Young boys’ parents, peers, and teachers all play a role in this encouragement. They were constantly reminded that weaknesses consist of failure and any other emotion besides anger. Emotions like sadness, empathy, and passivity have feminine attributes resulting with negative connotations as expressed in chapter eight. When a male of any age does something that isn’t deemed “rugged” or “masculine,” it is automatically viewed as a “girly” or “feminine” characteristic. This causes ridicule, embarrassment and harassment from their peers and male role models, mostly, by being called hurtful names and being compared to girls (because girls are considered weak).
From this type of upbringing, boys are more likely to bring aggression into many, if not all, of their relationships. Males who have this understanding about what it means to be a "real man," begin to have this mindset that they are “number one” and are the more powerful gender because they don’t obtain “weak” characteristics. "Social group norms, school norms, and children's aggressive intentions," an academic journal written by Christian Nipedal, Drew Nesdale, and Melanie Killen, discusses the connection between aggression and what are deemed as "school norms." I found this particular journal of relevance to this blog because it also references whether or not these instances of aggression are deliberate or subconcious. There was also discussion about levels of aggression found in males vs. females. I found that aggression, although found in both male and female children in school, are noted to be expressed in different situations. Boys are more likely to be aggressive when there's a competition with other boys, a power struggle between peers and teachers, and when they feel that they're being compared to femanine characteristics. Most of the journal focused primarily on how these types of norms are developed and ways in which they are presented to children in the academic atmostphere (Aggressive Behavior, May/Jun2010, Vol. 36 Issue 3, p195-204, 10p).
When we discussed this in class, I remember a while ago talking with someone about how I rarely feel anger. However, after the class lecture and reading your blog, I realized that of course I feel anger and quite often. But aggression and anger are viewed differently in boys than in girls and girls never know how to express their anger or aggression. When I'm angry, I cry because I have no idea how else to release it, so I confuse it with sadness. Girls are also more likely to take their anger out on themselves and express it inwardly while boys are encouraged to be aggressive and let their anger show because it is more accepted in society. I hate this. I think it is very important for parents to encourage their children at young ages to let out their feelings (sadness, anger, or happiness) in a healthy way and that it is okay for boys to cry and girls to get angry. It all needs to be expressed.
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